Is it normal to lose friends when you start getting healthy?

On Ep. 43, Nikkiey shares that many of the people who didn't support her early in her journey are no longer her friends, and neither are some who did. She firmly believes that as you move through different jobs, experiences and phases, you'll have different peer groups, and that this is okay. The friends who cheer you on are worth keeping close.

Why do some people push back? On Ep. 239, Nikkiey explains that your growth reminds some people that they're staying the same, and it's easier for them to criticize your journey than fix their own things. Nobody says a word when you skip the gym or settle for good enough, because that version of you is easy for them to handle. On Ep. 252, she adds that people are living from their own lens and may not understand what you're doing. That can look like jealousy, judgment, insecurity, disconnection, or family tension over new boundaries. It can come from friends of 20 or 30 years. She also notes some long friendships survive disagreement, so not every change means an ending.

It can feel lonely. On Ep. 363, Nikkiey says you may grieve the old you and notice relationships and social situations feel different, like not going out as often with the friends who drink every weekend. She says that unsettled feeling is not a sign something is wrong or that you should go back. It's a sign what you're doing is right. On Ep. 252 she puts it plainly: what's worse is shrinking yourself to stay relatable. You're allowed to outgrow people and protect your peace and your progress, and it's not your job to make everyone happy.